My brain says no but my pants say off.
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
I've blown a few things in my day
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize