Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
Randomize
