BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
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