At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
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