i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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