Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
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