I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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