Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize