Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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