we made out on top of his cat.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
