My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Randomize
