You're so nebulous sometimes
Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
