We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
Randomize