He uses pillows to masturbate.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
