we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
