god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Randomize
