Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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