Christians are straight up FREAKS
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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