Fuck appropriateness.
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
