He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize
