well I can't set my house on fire every night
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
This couple is walking their pig around campus
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