her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
Randomize
