What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
