Your dad touched me again.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
Randomize