You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
