nut hugger
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
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