good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Sext me about skeletons
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
