so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
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