Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
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