i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
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