Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
