I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
