Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(585): View more from New York

it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.

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(203): View more from Connecticut

there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...

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(214): View more from Texas

I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine

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(937): View more from Ohio

Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate

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(614): View more from Ohio

the wall and i were having dominance issues.

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(203): View more from Connecticut

Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.

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(607): View more from New York

Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!

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(919): View more from North Carolina

My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.

(252): View more from North Carolina

Wow..I bet that tasted bad.

(919): View more from North Carolina

Not tasted.

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(218): View more from Minnesota

Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.

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