I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
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