You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
