I bet he comes in French.
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
