He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Randomize
