I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Randomize
