Well douche your snatch and let's go!
OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
Randomize
