Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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