So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
