So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
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