do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
