he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
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