office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
Randomize
