How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
