rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
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