Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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