Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
oh god the rape fog is back!
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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