That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
