He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
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