he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
Randomize
